I’m moving to Los Angeles tomorrow

4 Jun

CBS, Wednesday nights, 8pm:  The Nanny.  I marveled at Fran Drescher and thought, “That’s what I want to do.”

I watched Punky Brewster, Elaine Benes, Chrissy Snow, Blair Warner… The Golden Girls.  I heard studio audiences laughing and applauding as Blanche rebounded from another failed attempt at love.  “That’s really what I want to do.  Forever.”

I love to entertain.  To call it a passion seems like an understatement.  I was inspired by the women listed above and so many more, and I want a shot to show the world I’m half as amazing.  So, in March with help from my friend Ellie I made the extremely difficult decision to quit my job at Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston, Massachusetts and move 3,000 miles away from my friends, family, and familiar stages to Los Angeles, California.

I’ve had to say a few very difficult goodbyes so far (nothing will compare to Dad and Brother tomorrow at the airport.)  But yeah, I’ve been crying a LOT.  It’s really heartbreaking and I can’t believe this is reality.

Knowing tonight was my last night at home, my seven year old sister was crying in my dad’s arms.  She couldn’t look at him or me.  I didn’t want her to see me crying, but I scooped her up and carried her into her bedroom where we cried in each other’s arms.  I said, “I love you, I love you, I’m so proud of you, and I couldn’t have asked for a better sister.”  She told me she was sad that I was leaving.  She said she would come visit and we’d go to Disney Land.  She asked me, “When you move to California, will you still cheer for the Red Sox?” I said, “I can go to LA, New York, Miami, China… Anywhere. I will always be a Boston girl.”

I feel scared, but I don’t know why.  I’m not afraid of failure.  I really believe that I will end up exactly where I should be.  Whether that’s on the cover of every magazine in the supermarket, or in a suburb of Boston with a husband and two kids.  I am a woman of faith and I trust completely I’ll be guided to where I need to be.

There’s this scene from one of my favorite movies, Selena, where she has a press conference in Mexico.  Her dad tells her, “Your Spanish has to be PERFECT.  If not, they will rip you to pieces.”  She goes, “Don’t worry Dad, I got this.”  During the press conference, she’s asked how she feels about her upcoming tour.  She replies, “Me siento muy…  Me siento muy… (long pause)  …EXCITED!”  Everyone busts out laughing and applauding.  That’s exactly how I feel.  Can’t really put it into the right words, pero me siento muy excited.

I don’t know what the future holds.  I don’t know where I’ll be next year (I’m not even 100% sure about next WEEK!)  But all I know is I will work so hard (that is a promise), I will never change who I am in my heart, and I will never ever forget all the love, support, encouragement, and kindness I received during my time in Boston.  I love you all wicked hard.



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