The Boston Marathon 2013

On April 13th-14th I was on a road gig.  I don’t often travel for comedy, and I was particularly excited about this one because I was expecting to see a special guy.  I was calling it, “a sure thing.”  I was spinning a roulette wheel where every peg had, “hot and sexy boning!” written on it.  I’ll keep details vague to protected the people or person who will one day be VERY VERY REGRETFUL and just let you know virtually nothing happened between us and I came home somewhat heartbroken.

On April 15th, I discovered what real heartbreak is.  Two explosions had gone off during the Boston Marathon, near the finish line, causing three deaths and countless injuries.  People with shrapnel in their legs are still coming into emergency rooms, and the number of injured parties is still growing.  Bostonians and visitors were treated for burns, cuts, and amputations.  Being at Brigham and Women’s Hospital, where I work, I heard every two minutes an ambulance leave the hospital.  Every.two.minutes.  It was painful to listen to because if you know me, you know I’m completely head over heals in love with Boston.  I felt like someone was attacking my husband.

The Boston marathon was such a special day for me growing up.  I grew up just two blocks between mile 23 and 24.  Every year I would go with my family to cheer on the runners and play out in the streets of Boston.  My friends and I would sell lemonade, or draw with chalk on the sidewalk.  As I got older, into high school, it became a day to try and get invited up to some apartment on Beacon St.  It became a day where no one called and asked, “Where are you?  When are you coming home?”  Because on that day the city is your babysitter.  You are protected on Marathon Monday.

The part of that day that will stick with me the most (the part I’m insisting sticks with me the most) is the bravery exerted during the blast.  An enormous explosion, smoke everywhere, people screaming and what do some of these men nearby do?  THEY RUN TOWARDS IT!  One explosion, two explosions, they didn’t know if there were more coming!  They had no idea.  It didn’t matter because there are people in this city– in this world– who do not hesitate when a fellow human being is in trouble.  Not friend, not family member, just another person.  You’ve heard the expression, “Like a bat out of hell.”  These people ran INTO the hell.  But not like a squeaky bat, but like a hawk, or eagle.  A big bird with a lot of courage and compassion.

I realized, if there are men in this world who will sacrifice their safety to possibly save a life then for me to be heartbroken over anyone else is a waste of time.  They say there are plenty of fish in the sea, but what they don’t tell you is some of those fish are guppies.  Some are piranhas and some are clown-fish.  But if you wait, and you look really closely, you’ll notice a lot of those fish are really smart dolphins, or emotionally strong whales.  And you might be saying to me, “Danielle, those aren’t fish.  Those are mammals.”  And to that I say, “With an attitude like that, you’re gonna end up with a shrimp.”  And to that you might say, “A shrimp is a crustacean.”  And to that I say, “Boston Strong, fahk you, if it’s at the New England Aquarium it’s fair game.”

So the moral of this story is don’t try to have sex with me unless you’ve saved at least three lives.  Or, if you’re not okay with me calling you “Officer” in the process.

I’ll love you forever, Boston!  You’re my home.